Crap talk.

My left leg is paralyzing but I still can hold it. My throat is sore. but I still can hold it. My heart is crying. I don't know what should I do about this.
I had been merciless to people since i was young. If the rules said white i will say white. Since when my heart started to crying? Since when?
I traced back my past. I got the answer. Since I torture it with misery.
my life is tough. It gets tougher and tougher. I was too weak to handle those things. people see me happy. but who knows under the smile has sorrow?
I sighed to my life. It want to stray me away, and i run away from it. And it keep chasing and chasing and chasing. Should I be blamed for revealing my life? Should I be blamed for being encouraged to do something I don't really need to do it?
Normally, people will think something negative about a person once a person do a mistake. thye will think this person will never change if they do the mistake twice. People look at MISTAKES instead of EFFORTS. Do you know if that person tried not to repeat the mistake for the second time? Do you know that the person do not like to make other people unhappy with what he/she had done? Why these people are too judgemental when seeing those people? If you have experience something with he/she which you dislike. would you go to the same person AGAIN? Seriously speaking, have you ever thought the same thing will happen, for the WORST CASE SCENARIO? Being too negligence lead you to another trouble, another problem which will be seen as never ending Problem.
Be niece when people r being nice to you. There is no loss. We love this life. no one wants to live in fight, hatred. or you just want to make things much more complicated? There is no use. simplify it or END IT.
All of this is in your hand. you know which one is better if your brain can think something better. not to mention. if there is no hope for the issue, let it go, even one side still holding it. Later the other side will realized that there is no use to hold the issue anymore. eventually, the issue will be abandoned. and you should not pick it anymore.
We are too negligence to have our mind to think about this. We are too stupid to realized that every hatred we put inside our heart is killing our soul.
Let the heart filled with love, let the face glows with smile and let have our life the fullest.

I'll never ask you again

This is
the end line
I'll never ask you again

This is
the end line
for my never ending apologies

I'm tired of this life
I'm tired looking for you
I'm tired to see anything from you
I'm tired to relate my life with you
with you..
with you..

We used to smile together
and laugh with the joke together
but it all the past
I need to forget
I need to forget

Never mind
whatever answer
you put myself in the tears

never mind
whatever you think
'cos I'll never put
my head 'bout you again

This is the end to this story
This is the end of my journey
to talk bout this to you...

If you don't see me again
I hope you find your peace there
and I'm glad you like my absence
and it's my please to see be away

I'll never miss you
I'll never miss you

Hope we will never see each other again
even though we will bump to each other
sometimes
It's okay with me to make you a stranger
and to walk around didn't see you

and hope you
never come to my life
I'll run away as far away as I could
from your life

let me spread the wings
and fly away
at the blue sky
never see you again
is my last wish
in my life

I don't want you to love me
I don't want you to hate me
hope you will forget my name
and all we had together
and once I stepped out from here
You never know me was here

and please
let me have my own way
I tried many things to run from you

Because I know I'll hurt you
again

This is
the end line
I'll never ask you again

Lepaskan aku

Ku berlari ke pantai
agar bayu ketenangan
lembut membelai hatiku

Ku berlari
meninggalkan tasik pilu
yang penuh air mataku dahulu

Ku dendangkan satu irama
menari penuh riang
penuh dengan keceriaan

Namun hadirmu
bersama gendangmu
langkah tariku jadi
mengikutmu

Jangan
Jangan kau paksaku
menari mengikutmu
aku sudah keliru

Jangan
Jangan kau bawa aku
ke teluk rindu
menangisi embun sayu
yang lalu

tariku tarian maafku
kepada dirimu
cuba lari dari mu
aku tak benci padamu

mengapa kita berjumpa lagi?
mengapa kita bergendang menari?
Genta hatiku berbunyi
memberi amaran
akan ada air mata nanti

Wahai Tuhan yang Satu
aku pinta pada-Mu
Jangan bawaku
kembali ke tasik pilu

Ku berserah kepada-Mu
pasrah dalam hati
pentas pantai ini
tiada awan benci

Biar aku terus merantau
mencari satu ketenangan
disebalik tabir kehidupan

Lepaskan aku dari rindu
satu rindu yang lalu
aku tak mahu lagi
menangisi diriku

Wahai Tuhan yang Satu
aku pinta pada-Mu
Jangan bawaku
kembali ke tasik pilu

8 months. Done.

yesterday was my last day working as trainee at Petlin. Bila nak habis intern, banyak pulak kerja nak dihabiskan.. huhu... sedih. my last days in Petlin ended with a farewell party at KGRP. Finally dpt gak jejak kaki kt sana.. hahaha.. But end of the day, sibuk dgn event. Very letih and my legs like nk tercabut coz mt shoes heels were a bit high so jln pun dah xbetul dah.. haha...
but seriously, sedih nk tinggal dept sebab dept nie dh byk tlg belajar about real working environment. Thank you.

Credits to my supervisor, aka HSE manager, puan zanariah, encik sukiman, kak fida, kak sharihan, harith , and faizah othman for the loving memories. gonna miss those time where we were running, yelling, shouting, joking and working together. you bring joys in working making me feel free to work without asking.

Don't

Don't let me say I love you. Because you steal my heart and didn't give it back to me.